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Tuesday, 30 August 2016

Word of the Week: Emotion

Last week my thoughts were primarily focused on Izzie starting school. A momentous occasion for her, not only the start of her formal education but much more importantly, she will be joining a new community and (fingers crossed) making lots of new friends. However, for me as a stay at home parent looking after two younger children, I hadn’t really thought about how my life would change and I certainly hadn’t allowed myself to get too emotional about the whole thing.

In the middle of last week I finished off the uniform shopping finally ticking “black pumps” off the list. Later that day I gathered everything together and, to avoid any first day disasters, I decided to get Izzie to try it all on. To my amazement she agreed and there wasn't the usual huffing, puffing and eye rolling!

There she stood in front of me, drowning in navy blue, hair scooped up on top of her head, shuffling from foot to foot. Understandably she was a little apprehensive but she was also clearly delighted with her new uniform and especially the tie! Suddenly I was hit with a huge wave of emotion - she just looked so grown up! Where exactly had my baby gone? I must have muttered these thoughts aloud because she looked at me and said “Don’t get all silly mum, I AM almost five.”  

Indeed she is almost five but it doesn’t even seem five minutes since we first brought her home from the hospital. I vividly recall sitting and staring at her as she slept, questioning how we had managed to create such a perfect little being. These thoughts periodically interrupted with that overwhelming sense of panic all new parents experience - Why is she so quiet? Is she still breathing? Should I poke her? Yes, I'll gently poke her...

Well in less than 2 weeks time that perfect little being will be starting school. I have been told over and over again to treasure these years as they pass so quickly, and now I finally agree. I have also come to realise that our family dynamic will inevitably change. Izzie will be away from me more days than she is with me. She is going to gain a new sense of independence and experience so many new things away from home. Since that first wave of emotion hit me last week, I admit I keep having mini episodes, lets call them shock waves. These normally end up with me bear-hugging poor Izzie while I remind myself that she is NOT five; she will always be my baby; and, in my eyes, that perfect little being I watched sleeping.

Wish us luck for next week, I think tissues maybe required!


She'll be off to work before we know it!


The Reading Residence

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4 comments:

  1. Yes and as quick as quick she will be married with a family of her own!!! Scary eh??? xxxxx love Mum xxxxx

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  2. Life passes us in the blink of an eye! I am not looking forward to experiencing this in 4 years though, it's a lovely post! #KCACOLS

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  3. They grow so quickly don't they?! My eldest goes to school next year but all the school posts are making me tear up! #KCACOLS

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